In this feature we will be bringing to you horror stories that people have expreciened dealing with idiots when buying online. This story comes from attempting to buy a Wii on Ebay, which when it got to me, was in nowhere near the condition as promised. I'm sure this has happened to us all, but this time I was so frustrated I couldn't just let the moment pass. What follows is his explanation to me and my response. I hope it inspires some of you.

This is his email to me:

The game is Brand new it is only opened and dirty because the shrink wrap was torn by my daughter but never was game opened or played.. The controller I will be happy to swap for you no problem I can exchange at game store in town--The Wii sports is not an accessory but a game-- which I did not list because daughter stepped on and cracked being a youngster but all accessories were included to play.. I will be happy to exchange the controller as I said-- I actually did for that one because daughter was too young to use remote style-( one of reasons I sold Wii is daughters inability to grip concepts at her age) So will not be hard to trade back in for remote again...Or I can credit you some of the diffference between controllers so you can exchange or just buy another remote.. I am happy to try and help,but was honest in games,extra controller( did not indicate remote but controller)..Just lmk how to help--Asala

and my response:

"Dear Asala,
I'm sorry to hear that your daughter is special needs, but stay strong, they have good programs for that now a days.

I wish that I could just consider the extra money to you as a gift, but unfortunetly I'm only a recent college graduate and have a family of my own. My youngest daughter has a cleft lip and we're already doing without electricity next month in order to pay for the corrective surgery. That's why it was so important to have the Wii now while we still have a week left on the bills.

I'd ask my mother for help with these issues except that she doesn't remember who I am, what with all the alcoholism and Alzheimer's. And poor pappy doesn't get parole for another 6 months.

So as you can see, I have my own problems to worry about beyond your stupid daughter, and I mean that in both an angry turn of phrase as well as a literal description of her intelligence level.

Please send me another controller immediately or your daughter herself, as I'd be happy to angrily wave either one at my screen.

Thank you so much for you time,
Micah