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Nintendo Announces Controversial Sequel To Wii-Fit

June 6, 2008 by myka

Kyoto, Japan - This morning following the great success of Wii-fit, Nintendo president and CEO, Satoru Iwata, announced a sequel.

Iwata stated "This game is coming earlier than anticipated, however, we must strike while the iron is hot and the youth is still tubby. Especially in America, they are such fat asses. We've had Dance Dance Revlution for years, then we took off 6 of the buttons, gave it a catchy name [Wii-fit] and the idiots are buying it."

Wise words from a wise business man. This sequel is also sure to pull in lots of dough from an even larger audience than fat people...lazy people. See picture of the coming up packaging below.

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January 20-February 18
Recheck your credit card balance -- if you're close to the limit, now is the time to settle up. There are lots of ways to manage debt like shaking trees and selling the apples that fall out. If you didn't understand this piece of advice, it's because you don't play Animal Crossing, and therefore, are not a complete idiot. Congratulations.

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How Do I Find My IP Address?

February 19, 2009 by myka

Windows 95/98 - open a command prompt and type "winipcfg"

Windows XP, 2000 - Goto Start menu and click "run...". Type "cmd". A command prompt will open, then type "ipconfig". This will display your IP address.

Mac OS X - Click the Apple dropdown menu and choose system preferences. Then "Internet and network" click 'network'. A window will open with your IP address in it.

If you are behind a proxy or local gateway (example: your IP shows up as 192.168.X.X), then goto a website that will detect it for you, such as Http://www.IPChicken.com

Have fun with your new info!

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Top Ten Things You Can Learn By Watching Red Vs. Blue

February 9, 2009 by SSXallnight

Any gamer worth his snuff is familiar with Red Vs. Blue, but not a lot of people realize the educational value of the Halo-based machinima. If you're one of the unfortunates who isn't cool enough to know about the hilarious internet series; here is a list of things you would know if you didn't spend so much time doing your homework or actually showing up on time to your job.

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5 Steps To Become A Pretentious Asshole

November 29, 2008 by myka

Pretentious Bunny

Sometimes just knowing something isn't enough. To truly appreciate knowledge, one must draw attention mercilessly to themselves. So, Two Bit News is happy to present this top list to sounding like a pretentious asshole, or guide if you prefer deriving from the latin word meaning "full of information" (more on this later!).

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