NCAA Football Rules!

March 26, 2009 by Jack Belmont

I dedicate this to everyone who will appear in this game, may you enjoy your short fame and always remember your high school days when you mattered... like this guy.

SAN DIMAS - Today EA has announced they will release NCAA Football 10, yeah 10, like they had nine before and will make another. The game boasts all 120 teams and the countless players that don’t have what it takes to make it to the NFL.

On top of that the game will add cool credit system that will allow users to play mini games online or off to earn such credits. EA went a little further and added some little things to your in games play, like flags and camera flashes. I spoke to one college student over at Texas A&M here’s what he said.

“I had many good times playing football as a kid, there's nothing like tackling another man down covered in sweat sticking your thumb up his ass and feeling his hot breath on your face as he grunts in pain telling you to stop, but you don’t stop you just keep going trapping him in your big arms knowing that everyone thinks this is just a game and my father won’t disown me” I informed him that I don’t feel that way and in fact think football is a talentless sport. “Oh well, it’s just you know, down here we think it’s fun.”

I asked him how he felt his chances of being drafted where. “I don’t know man, I don’t know, all I know is I never regretted my days in football and will always have them to look back on. Like I remember this one day when we all played shirtless in the sun, God Jeffery Gordon smelled so good, he has this cute hairdoo it made me wanna fuck him so hard in the ass- I mean sack him.”

I’m Jack Belmont and here’s a little Ataris to pick up the mood here.

Your rating: None Average: 10 (1 vote)

Reviews

Games Gone Wrong

Comic

February, 8, 2009

Horoscopes

AQUARIUS
January 20-February 18
Recheck your credit card balance -- if you're close to the limit, now is the time to settle up. There are lots of ways to manage debt like shaking trees and selling the apples that fall out. If you didn't understand this piece of advice, it's because you don't play Animal Crossing, and therefore, are not a complete idiot. Congratulations.

Features

10 Minute Recipes for Gamers - Garlic Cheese Pasta

June 3, 2008 by Micah Bleich

We've all been in that situation we hate. In the 9th hour of a Smash Brothers Brawl, or Halo 3 session when Mr. hunger comes knocking on our stomach lining like an angry husband returning from a deadly salmon run to find you sleeping with his wife.

Your rating: None Average: 9.3 (3 votes)

Top 7 Iron Mans

May 27, 2008 by Micah Bleich

No, we didn’t make a mistake. The title is, in fact, “Top 7 Iron Mans,” not “Iron Men.” We’re counting down the 7 people that have best honored the iron name with great accomplishments and general bad-assery. Some of these may shock you, but rest assured, they are rated by the highest authorities on the subject matter (or any subject matter, as far as we’re concerned): hardcore gamers.
Your rating: None Average: 10 (8 votes)

Why does my girlfriend complain so much about my gaming?

May 15, 2008 by Mercedes Moore

Dear Mercedes, How much time can I buy myself while playing video games before going to bed without pissing my girlfriend off? -GTAguy

Your rating: None Average: 10 (3 votes)