Guitar Hero: World Tour Song By Song Review

November 20, 2008 by Micah Bleich

Well, the 4th edition of the Guitar Hero series is upon us and it's rife with already done hackneyed game functions stolen from Rockband, but hey, it's got cymbals!
I'm not going to bore you with my opinion of how much the sensitivity levels of the drums suck, or how awesome it is that you can trick your girlfriend into playing a video game with you. You can read that shit on some other website that actually cares if you're informed. Micah and KT are here to enterain and, of course, educate!

Thefefore, I'm going to run through the song list and tell you why that song is awesome or blows like clown in a balloon animal contest.

• "Beautiful Disaster" -- 311Perfect for masochists that enjoy hearing their guy friends sing a bit too high pitched while trying to avoid sounding like Bob Marley having a seizure.

• "The Kill" - 30 Seconds to MarsNamed because it will KILL you after your teenage sister plays it 100 times in a row while constantly talking about how dreamy Jared Leto is.

• "Too Much Too Young" - AirbourneFake AC/DC, that being said, not a bad tune if you like bare chested men.

• "Ramblin Man" - The Allman Brothers BandA classic. Maybe a bit low energy for a full band party, but so much fun alone on a saturday night when you couldn't get a date and are getting drunk alone.

• "Good God" - AnoukCrazy old fashioned chick rock. Think Amy Winehouse + Courntey Love.... OW! That hurts.

• "Never Too Late" - The AnswerHardcore rockin', makes me want to punch little kids in the face. Could be good or bad, depending on how evil you are. (Hint: If you like burning kittens, you'll love this song.)

• "One Armed Scissor" - At The Drive-InHigh energy, not quite punk not quite metal. Great for those that love out of tune shouting!

• "No Sleep Till Brooklyn" -- Beastie BoysIf I said anything bad about this I'd be killed by an angry mob. Plus it's always fun to rap in a music game.

• "Hail to the Freaks" - BeatsteaksI'm not quite sure what a Beatsteak is, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with really short songs with incomprehensible lyrics.

• "Rebel Yell" - Billy IdolBILLY IDOL MOTHA-FUCKAS!!!!!!

• "Stillborn" - Black Label SocietyCreepy if you're normal, great if you hate everyone in the universe.

• "Weapon of Choice" - Black Rebel Motorcycle ClubWhat's with all the Black in the band names? What happened to the Pastel Purple Rebel Motorcycle Club.

• "Dammit" - blink-182If you're a pretenious music snob you'll hate it. Otherwise you'll have a blast rocking out to power-pop.

• "One Way or Another" - BlondieThe music is infectious but if you stop to listen to the lyrics you won't be able to sleep tonight.

• "Hollywood Nights" - Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet BandGood song, but your dad probably got your mom pregnant to this jam back in the day, and thats too much to handle.

• "Livin' On A Prayer" - Bon Jovi Bon Jovi always knows how to sum up my life in his songs.  For this reason, he is a genius.  For this same reason, he is retarded.

• "Scream Aim Fire" - Bullet For My Valentine Can it get anymore emo than this?  Scream, fire, bullet, valentine...whoa.  Reminds me of my Prom Date, "Date-Rape Larry". May he rest in peace.

• "Shiver" - Coldplay People, it's called "Guitar Hero".  Not, "Fair-Trade Hippie Dipshit Hero".  This does not belong here and should never be played more than once to help yourself advance to the next song/level. [Editor's Note: This song will get you laid. Learn it.]

• "Up Around The Bend" - Creedence Clearwater Revival Classic band, but this one sounds like something that would be played during the intermission of a KKK meeting.  Specifically during the "networking session" where new and old members can mingle amonst a delightful spread of assorted cookies, lemonade and seared-sinner-satay.

• "Love Removal Machine" - The Cult Where can I find said machine?  Love totally SUCKS!  No, I'm not bitter, I just wish everyone in love would die in a fiery blender mishap.

• "Feel the Pain" - Dinosaur Jr. In reality a lovely diddy, that does not make me feel the pain at all.  Only bliss, which brings me back to the mid nineties, when I was about 11 years old, and my only concern was the TGIF television line-up. Oh Urkel, you sure did know how much Family Matters.

• "Love Me Two Times" - The Doors Two times? Jesus, what am I a sex machine? This song should be more aptly named after gamers like me: "Love Yourself One Time, Cry and fall asleep."

• "Pull Me Under" - Dream Theater An impressive blend of metal and sassy emo attitude.

• "Hotel California" - The Eagles This song would rock, if not for the fact that every single person in the universe chooses this song and proclaims it's their favorite, as if they're somehow important and not just a pretentious asshole that one time listened to a song older than 'Nsync.

• "Aggro" - The Enemy Imagine Green Day from Great Britain, instead of just singing with that weird fake British accent for no apparent reason.

• "Hey Man, Nice Shot" - Filter One hit wonders of the nineties.  "Hey man, nice shot" indeed.

• "Go Your Own Way" - Fleetwood Mac An excellent example of choosing the wrong song by the right band.

• "Everlong" - Foo Fighters The song that every guy learns to play on his acoustic guitar, thinking that if they can master it, they will master all women.  They are wrong.  But it's still a good song.

• "American Woman" - The Guess Who You mean Lenny Kravitz didn't write this song originally for Heather Graham?

• "You're Gonna Say Yeah!" - Hush Puppies I'm gonna say yeeeeaah. By far the best almost punk entry on the album, lord knows I've played it more than my fair share.

• "Obstacle 1" - Interpol Be careful when playing in a group. After listening to this song you'll think you're too important to pass the guitar to the next person.

• "Mountain Song" - Jane's Addiction This is the easiest addiction I ever had to quit.

• "Purple Haze (Live)" - Jimi Hendrix & "The Wind Cries Mary" - Jimi Hendrix Jimi! Jimi! Jimi! I cannot say a bad word about that man. Just be prepared for a finger work out.

• "The Middle" - Jimmy Eat World I love JEW.  I also love matzo ball soup, but that's totally unrelated and moreso a nonsequiter.  I just haven't eaten in days....

• "Satch Boogie" - Joe Satriani & "Vinternoll2" - Kent If you honestly knew these songs before you played the game, you sir are a music historian's god. I salute you.

• "Freak on a Leash" - Korn I know I know, you think it's gonna rock, but believe me, singing "hum da da bedda" over and over for 2 minutes is not as easy or spectacular as you think.

• "Our Truth" - Lacuna Coil Is this like a Christian fundamentalist rock band?  Our Truth?  You can always tell when He and Him are capitalized.  Look at the liner notes and get back to me on this one.

• "Are You Gonna Go My Way" - Lenny Kravitz It depends, where are you going?  If it's to the market, I need to pick up some milk and hypodermic needles anyway.  So, sure.

• "What I've Done" - Linkin Park What have you done? Seriously, I bet it was cool, cuz you have piercings and angst. Sigh, I'm just jealous.

• "Prisoner of Society" - The Living End Popularized psychobilly music for the masses with this catchy but annoying ditty.  Thanks, I guess?

• "La Bamba" - Los Lobos I keep thinking of the song "Tequila" which is totally not the same, and makes me seem like a racist.  I'm not.  I mean, I totally love tacos and burritos, so how can I be?

• "Rooftops (A Liberation Broadcast)" - Lost Prophets Not lost enough. Good god man, comb your bloody hair.

• "Sweet Home Alabama (Live)" - Lynyrd Skynyrd If I've learned anything from Kid Rock, it's that mullets, binge drinking and Lynyrd Skynyrd are cool.

• "L'Via L'Viaquez" - Mars Volta If anyone cared to ask me, I'd say that At the Drive-In kicks a lot more ass than the jam band that has become Mars Volta.  It's like they suddenly decided they were now 40, and they get together to mess around on their instruments for a really long time so they don't have to go home to their families.  Then they record these sessions and break them up into 12 songs.  When really, it's just one, really long song. But I digress.

• "Kick Out The Jams" - MC5's Wayne Kramer Bad ass. Just wow, amazing jam, soulful, fun, for the people rock music. Play it, love it.

• "Trapped Under Ice" - Metallica The kings of anarchy are now the poster children for capitilistic greed. They do make some nicely challenging Guitar Hero songs, but this is not the best of them.

• "Beat It" - Michael Jackson I love it when people say, I like Michael Jackson's pre-crazy stuff.  So do I.  This is the jam right here.

• "Float On" - Modest Mouse At least they're modest about it. This will help you take a nap after what seems like the 700th minute of "we'll all float on" repeated over and over.

• "Overkill" - Motorhead It's MOTORHEAD.  If you hate on them, you're a total loser. Just kidding. Seriously though.  A loser.

• "Assassin" - Muse If you like Muse, you'll love it. If you don't, you'll claw your skin off your face.

• "Nuvole e Lenzuola" - Negramaro Goto Home Depot and pickup someone to help you sing this before you put the disc in, it's unpossible otherwise to sing (ok I'm just lazy).

• "About a Girl (Unplugged)" - Nirvana I enjoy living so I'm not going to mock Nirvana. Plus I honestly enjoy this song...now put the gun down, everyone from the 90s.

• "Spiderwebs" - No Doubt Remember when Gwen Stefani didn't cause your ear drums to bleed?

• "Soul Doubt" - NOFX NOFX makes me want to get trampled in a mosh circle.  Willingly.

• "Some Might Say" - Oasis There's something about Oasis that makes me not like them very much. hmmmm...what is it? Oh right, they're stuck up brats.

• "Crazy Train" - Ozzy Osbourne & "Mr. Crowley" - Ozzy Osbourne The Dark Prince....is now in World of Warcraft commercials. WE'VE MADE IT BABY, GAMERS ARE OFFICIALLY COOL!

• "Misery Business" - Paramore Who told Paramore they were hardcore? They make my rock spirit die a little each tiem I hear them.

• "Heartbreaker" - Pat Benatar Bad-ass Benatar. This chick will fuck you up all while keeping her leotard from causing a wedgie.

• "The One I Love" - R.E.M. This is not the one R.E.M. song I love. It's almost like I'm losing my religion....*hint* *cough*

• "Escuela De Calor" - Radio Futura Seriously, what's with all the spanish songs? Catchy music and all, but I can't understand a damn thing. Maybe I should stop eating so much vanilla yogurt and go out and get some real culture.

• "Re-Education Through Labor" - Rise Against Dripping with obvious commentary on society, I'm just not exactly sure what their point is.

• "Pretty Vacant" - Sex Pistols ANARCHY SEX AND DRUGS!!!!!! WOOOOOO!!!

• "Lazy Eye" - Silversun Pickups You have been waaaaiiitin' alllll yourrr life....for this song to end.

• "Today" - Smashing Pumpkins What up 1997?  Thank you for making my tween years better than what kinds experience now.  I fear for our youth these days, with their High School musicals.  Shudder.

• "Do It Again" - Steely Dan Don't do it again, please, once is enough, thanks kindly.

• "The Joker" - Steve Miller Band Good song, just make sure you don't have an annoying friend on vocals or he'll look a bit too much like he's making love to the mic as he butchers the song's mellow sexual inuendos.

• "Demolition Man (Live)" - Sting Have you been stung? This one's for the ladies and their tantric dreams.

• "Love Spreads" - The Stone Roses Oh bright eyed, bushy tailed British boys.  How's that alliteration for you?  Anyway, while the song is called Love Spreads, clearly they did not take into account what happens when you spread love.  The letters included are S, T, and D, by the way.

• "Toy Boy" - Stuck In The Sound If this was a dyslexic attempt at Boy Toy then this is another one for the ladies. Otherwise, I just don't fuckin' get it.

• "Santeria" - Sublime Play only while stoned.  Or while simulatenously playing hacky sac.  While stoned.

• "Eye of the Tiger" - Survivor The ultimate 80s anthem song.  Put on some sweats, and then cut them off into shorts, and slip them over another pair of sweats while playing for the full effect.  Rock out as directed.

• "B.Y.O.B." - System of a Down Ok, I will B.Y.O.B.  But don't expect me to share with you douchebags.  Seriously, don't touch my shit.  I don't care how bad the economy is.

• "Stranglehold" - Ted Nugent A song named after what I think is a wrestling move is obviously bad-ass.  Nugent is bad-ass.  Enough said. Blond mullet required.

• "Monsoon" - Tokio Hotel his is like, the hip music, right?  I've stopped listening and caring a long time ago, so I really don't know.  But when you misspell cities and get a shitty haircut, it's like, cool.  Right?

• "Parabola" - Tool & "Schism" - Tool & "Vicarious" - Tool If you're a Tool head (like we are!) then you'll love rocking out to these. If you're not, well, then go take 30-40 minutes to go get snacks, cuz these go on for quite a while.

• "Antisocial" - Trust The band is called Trust and the song is called Antisocial.  Where were you when I was in high school?  Wait, where are you in my life NOW.

• "Hot For Teacher" - Van Halen So are MILFS cool again? Well regardless, Van Halen and old chicks just go hand in hand. Too bad the old video of the teacher stripping wasnt' included, or you could go in your own hand.

• "On The Road Again" - Willie Nelson Finally. Something my dad can play without complaining that it's "too loud!" or "really weird!"

• "Band on the Run" - Wings Hate to admit it, but this song is so long and monotone, that you may find yourself belting out the lyrics and doing a little head nod and lip bite action while singing. On the drums your hands will cramp.

• Zakk Wylde's Original Guitar Duel Recording I had never heard this before, but it does not matter either way.  It makes me want to shout "I CHALLENGE YOU TO A GUITAR DUEL!" while I groom my invisible handlebar mustache.  Which then makes this automatically awesome.

There you have it! Check back for reviews of downloadable content of Guitar Hero World Tour and Rockband 2 as they become available!

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